Stardust

When I first launched this blog back in February, the idea behind it was that I would regularly post about my travels, specifically the experiences I was to have during my time in Europe and hopefully beyond that as I got older. That idea is still there, though since I'm currently living in Tallahassee going to school, I'm going to focus more on the things that are happening in my life right now and my thoughts as I near my graduation date, travel-related or otherwise. The past two months have been sort of a blur, the highlights fuzzy images of books I've attempted to read and finish, Halloween parties, football games, a special little grey kitten named Binx, and university parking garages. All of these things come with the mundane, though somehow still exciting life I lead as a Florida State Seminole. However blurry my vision might be when I look back on this semester though, this weekend was an eye-opener. It was like going to the optometrist and putting a pair of glasses I've needed since the sixth grade on for the first time. Cheesy? Yes. True? Also yes. I feel like this might belong on Tumblr instead of an actual blog.

This weekend I got to have a few fantastic conversations with a couple of new friends, as well as old friends of course. Topics mostly revolved around travel, experiences while abroad, et cetera. Through all the pressure I've felt this semester regarding what it is I'm planning on doing after graduation (that seems to be the question of the century), it was almost like a giant weight was lifted off my shoulders. In the last three or four days, I've realized that no one knows what they're doing after graduation. Especially as a student who is graduating in three years instead of the normal four, that was beyond relieving to hear. I'm only 20! What's that Britney song called again? "I'm Not A Girl, Not Yet A Woman"? Pop princesses aside, if I met any young woman my age in my situation who knew exactly what she was doing after school, I'd be amazed. I'd also question her sanity.

So, what it all really boils down to is: what do I want? Truthfully, I want to leave again. I want to travel longer and I want to travel further. So, that's what I'm going to do. After school, I'll find a couple of humdrum jobs so that I can save money, I'll keep blogging, and as soon as I have a few thousand saved, I'm off to Paris again. This is my decision, and this time I'm sticking to it. I owe it to myself to be happy, to live the life that I want instead of being stuck doing something that 's practical or failsafe but that my heart isn't in. 

It's time to live for yourself.